From Erika: "Many people here in the Cannimal community have lost dear animals or are preparing to let go. Besides the day we actually "find" or "bring home" our beloved animal, the day they cross the Rainbow Bridge can be one of the most difficult and equally profound days of our lives. Sometimes even more so than when we lose a human family member! Eva Chan was that dog for me and she is now the inspiration for Cannimal.
Olivia Rae is a powerful intuitive and breathwork teacher. She helps animals and their humans understand the patterns and projections that will help clear up behaviors such as separation anxiety or aggression. I knew Olivia would have some amazing insight on transitions after her Eleanor unexpectedly passed in January 2019.
The first thing I remember feeling when I met Eleanor was she was a very young dog who had been through a lot~ used and abused~ but she still had that strong, sweet Bulldog soul. You could visibly see the tension she carried in her back and front shoulders... as if she carrying a burden of her own. I was happy to hear Eleanor was using the Cannimal Relieve Formula to help with her chronic pain and inflammation.
I took these sweet photos of Olivia and Eleanor on the day I met them at the beautiful Den Urban Dog in LA in December 2018 at my first Calm Your Paws Workshop. I could feel the deep trust and love they had for eachother that day." ~ Erika
Eleanor was an English Bulldog I never meant to adopt. I was new to LA, working two jobs to support myself, and not even considering adopting a dog - much less an older dog whose health concerns were questionable at best . Her name was Chunker when I met her, and she was a former backyard breeder. Short-legged, overweight, and full of so much love.
At only three years old, Eleanor had already given birth to 3 litters - all delivered via C-Section- which is the standard method of birth for the English Bulldog breed. A uterine infection had forced an emergency spay surgery. Eleanor was of no use to the breeders any more, and they surrendered her to the pet store I wandered into that day.
Being familiar with the human-like demeanor that is a bulldog, my heart melted the moment I saw her. I visited her practically every day for a month, taking her on an hour-long walk around the block. At that time she was so overweight that it was difficult for her to walk for long periods of time. She preferred to sit on the sidewalk and cuddle, so that’s what we spent most of our time doing. Eventually a friend came to visit her with me, and his observation of the palpable love between us convinced me that she was clearly my dog.
I must admit Eleanor was certainly not the dog I would have picked for myself. But she was the dog that was meant for me. For almost three years, she was with me through the biggest growth periods in my life as I grew my business and created a life in Los Angeles. Despite her past, Eleanor's sweet personality was intact; she had the ability to make people smile and her love was instantly contagious.
In January 2019, Eleanor passed away unexpectedly in the middle of the night. I have never experienced the intense sadness and grief brought on by the experience of suddenly losing my best friend. Guilt dragged me down, filling my head with thoughts of: “What could I have done differently? Did I miss something?" It felt like time stood still and nothing mattered.
But I clearly felt Eleanor visit me in spirit the morning of her passing. Her message was clear and insistent: it was her time to go. Her physical form had seen a rough start and the toll it took on her grew to be more than she could bear.
Spirit's timing is always perfect, and Eleanor had timed the point of her exit in unison with a much larger chapter closing in my life. The energies she had come to help me heal were complete. Nothing I could’ve done would have prevented the outcome of her soul transition- because we had learned as much as we could from each other in the physical.
Eleanor's death shook my whole world to the core... expanding my reality in a way I never could have accessed without her. I feel her constantly- cheering me on, sending me support and encouragement to keep going and growing. In fact, I feel we have a relationship that is much richer than the one we had in our time spent together in the physical as bulldog and human.
I am human. I still grieve the loss of the physical form of my sweet Eleanor. But the sadness is brief - quickly brought to light by the understanding that there isn’t actually any death. There is only transition - the alchemization of spirit. With this understanding comes the knowing that when we lose someone- animal or human- it is not the last time we will see them. Those we encounter in this world are on our path for a reason; a part of the story we have created for ourselves in order to learn our truth.
Animals have undeniably shown up throughout my life to bring messages that keep me in alignment, that help me break, shed, release and heal.
The more consciousness we bring to our relationship with our animals, the more consciousness we bring to every moment of our life. When we see our animals as an important part of our human experience, our animal companions transform from "pets" into beings holding space for us to come fully into the present moment.
Olivia is a certified breath work teacher with two years of training in the intuitive arts. She is available for private breath work sessions combining conscious connected breathing with energy work and visualization techniques. The sessions are a unique experience centered around teaching clients to communicate with their e-motions (energy in motion).